I thought today was not going to be a good day. It was one of those days when I wake up, and the sudden feeling of being hopeless and loss overwhelmed me. I was getting a tad too tired of having to keep explaining myself to people so that they do not misinterpret and misunderstand me. And it happens pretty frequently this year, the lousy year of the Rat. I was frustrated my normally safe judgement of situation and people has gone haywire. I was mad with myself for allowing things to take control of me and being caught in a situation I did not anticipated and wanted. I needed help. All I wanted was advice and to solve problems, and to ride out the last 2 months of the year safely.
Luckily I went to Lati Rinpoche's event today, the entire day. In the morning and afternoon of pujas and till the last session of Vajrasattva Initiation tonight. I really wanted to purge out all the negativities I have been feeling lately. I needed to recharge my batteries, as I feel really lembek (Malay for 'physically weak'). Plus, mentally weak. The practise of Vajrasattva purifies obstacles. Unless we do purification to eliminate the negativities, our present store of negativities will continue to increase. It is like borrowing a huge sum of money; the interest keeps accumulating.
I made a new friend today. She was sitting next to me, and she was not feeling well. So I offered her the "high class medicated oil" Rich Friend bought for me. She felt slightly better. We chatted and we shared our Dharma experience. And we exchanged Dharma songs via bluetooth. We continued chatting while on the way home. She is such a pleasant girl, soft spoken and very humble. At first I thought she was a foreigner (she looks like a Korean celebrity). She said we both 有缘 to be friends. And I agree. So I am happy to have found a new friend today.