Monday, 31 December 2007

I am nothing

Before I go out for further drinks and countdown, I am actually kinda sick since Christmas but no one knows or cares. Splitting headache. Before the new year kicks in, I am leaving 2007 on a very very sad note, much as I hate to. Sometimes what we wanted or what we planned for just did not happen. Sometimes what you set out to achieve just did not materialise. Sometimes people we love so much leave us with more remorse and grief. Sometimes people we love just left us suddenly. It's been a roller coaster ride towards the tailend of 2007. In some way, I am glad I am finally outta 2007. I am not exactly keen on 2008 which is an unknown mystery to me. I know that one of my resolution is, I shall not be too nice to everyone I meet, and especially those I care about. The more you care, the more hurt you receive. I have always believe in being the giver rather than taker. But no matter how noble I hope to be, sometimes I feel being loved is still better than to love. Sometimes loving a dog is better. Because at least it appreciates and reciprocate your love and show it really is happy because of your existance. Yup, nothing beats the sudden realisation that I have done nothing, that I am actually "nothing". This suddenly dawned upon me. This suddenly woke me up. Everything I ever did was nothing. In the eyes of some, I am actually nothing. I must have been 2007's most greatest fool. Such irony to realise this on the very last day of this goddamn year.

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