Some random thoughts in retrospect (this posting has been saved in Draft for a long time, and I wrote the below a little at a time when I just need to get something off my mind):
- I do not like to see people with a black face everyday (who does, anyway?). Yes we may have our own problems or we are very bothered by certain issues at the present moment, but pulling a long face all the time is not going to help you much. We tend to be a frog in the well sometimes. We think that only our problems are the biggest and the worst. Well, take a step back, put yourselves in other people's shoes. Think about others who may have similar problems or even worse problems than you. You are moody, but think about how your face is going to affect others' moods. Imagine what adverse effects being temperamental and moody is to your loved ones; family, spouse, kids, friends. Especially kids, who are very vulnerable, may take it the wrong way by seeing your behaviour and behaving likewise. Anyway, having a black face is not going to help in improving your luck much, right? So, are you putting a black face everyday without realising it?
- There are some people online who are so preoccupied in getting thousands of "followers" in Twitter and having lots of "friends" in Facebook. It may help advertise your business (if that is your main motive) or it may show how popular you are but isn't that a bit shallow? So what if you have 1 million followers, or if you follow 1 million people? (unless you are a famous celebrity like Bill Clinton). Do you have time to read every single spam tweet? Do you intend to get to know each and every one of the 1 million followers? To me personally, I would only want people to "follow" me in Twitter, only if they already know me personally or from my blog, or if they genuinely want to know me through my tweets, what I do etc.... otherwise, I am fine if they do not "follow" me. I do not just "follow" anyone in Twitter (unless I know them) just because they are "following" me. It appears a little rude if you "unfollow" someone and that someone knows about it later.
- I have some friends and loved ones who are still adverse to using the tools of internet; Facebook, Twitter, Friendster, MSN etc... or just plainly prefer not to be online. One main gripe - loss of privacy. This issue was brought up on Sunday Times. I am not going to discuss the pros and cons of online privacy. I am just saying the pros are many if we can manage the cons properly and provided we are not abused by over-enthusiastic people who wants to "network". And anyway, to "victims" who do not wish to have their privacy invaded, they can always not add/accept someone in Facebook, or they can always "delete" someone or they can always set the privacy settings to their online information and photos. I know of parents telling their children they do not allow them to use Facebook, or Friendster or whatever... First, not being able to always pique these kids' curiosity even more that they will sooner or later "try it in the dark". Second, you can only assess how good or how bad online tools are unless you have used/explored it personally (and not just from hearsay or reading about the disadvantages of it). We have to be aware if we are not following technology, we are behind it. It is fine if we prefer not to be caught up with all these technology stuff, but do you know you are also preventing yourself from loads of useful information like first-hand important news, just as in the same way you are preventing your kids the chance to explore, the chance to decide themselves what is good or bad for them. You can always read news from newspapers yes, but it is always one day late compared to online which is instantaneously.
- I am scared of people who put on a superficial persona. On the public front, they seem nice, gracious and generous, that they attract many people to them. But when you get to know them better on a personal level, they can turn out to be petty, temperamental, edgy and easily angered and everything contradictory to what they portray on the outside. When I do meet such people, I will run away (very far) just to avoid them. I do not like any interaction with such people, much lest get scolding for nothing, especially when I had utmost respect for them in the first place (or so I thought). It makes life complicated and tiring, if you put on a mask all the time. You end up being the lonely and sad one because no one really knows you or understands you at all. Be genuine, because people can tell sooner or later if you are not.
- Self praise is the most destructive to the soul. Some people do have the habit of blowing their own trumpet all the time. Every little thing they do is glorified in unprofound ways. Self praise doesn't count. A word from someone in favour of you is worth more than 1000 glorified words you heap upon yourself. Sometimes thinking too highly of oneself makes one appear too condescending to the rest of us the "lowly" beings. Do you need to know that a person is a billionaire before you talk to him/her? Be humble.
- It was only recently I started to read some prominent bloggers' blogs. At first I was taken aback by the way they use language nowadays, and almost every sentence is peppered with not-so-nice expressions, like F**K, WTF, CCB, KNN, KNNCCB, FML etc..... In addition, I was a little appalled that they can be so blatant in scolding people in their blog. I was more concerned how this would have any effect on the younger set of readers. It also suddenly dawned on me.... no wonder a few of my young staff also "talk" in such similar manner. One of them, a guy, actually quoted a prominent blogger when he tried to justify his reason for his unprofessional rude behaviour. Does it make it alright for him and for the rest of us when that prominent blogger behaves the same way? And no wonder some of my staff in their early 20s tend to have childish expressions like "pui", "boo", "bleah" in sometimes formal official platform. It is all for fun, I know. But work is work, and we cannot mix our local slang into work unneccessarily, especially in writing. I am not saying some of these bloggers are wrong in writing that way. It is their style. And actually after reading more about what they wrote, you sort of gather what kind of character they are, sometimes lovable (that's why they are popular) sometimes bochap and rude (because they just want to be true to themselves), and sometimes they made you laugh. I guess maybe when the younger set of bloggers gets older (say when they are married and have kids), then perhaps they will be able to see how the by-then younger bloggers write, and maybe they would be shocked too (just as I am now). Then the "vicious" cycle continues...
Post note - With all the above phenomena, looks like we have to grapple with 2 extreme sets of people, from the aggressive blatant "networking" internet-savvy bunch to the internet-phobia bunch. In this instance, I guess it is always best to be somewhere in between.
- I do not like to see people with a black face everyday (who does, anyway?). Yes we may have our own problems or we are very bothered by certain issues at the present moment, but pulling a long face all the time is not going to help you much. We tend to be a frog in the well sometimes. We think that only our problems are the biggest and the worst. Well, take a step back, put yourselves in other people's shoes. Think about others who may have similar problems or even worse problems than you. You are moody, but think about how your face is going to affect others' moods. Imagine what adverse effects being temperamental and moody is to your loved ones; family, spouse, kids, friends. Especially kids, who are very vulnerable, may take it the wrong way by seeing your behaviour and behaving likewise. Anyway, having a black face is not going to help in improving your luck much, right? So, are you putting a black face everyday without realising it?
- There are some people online who are so preoccupied in getting thousands of "followers" in Twitter and having lots of "friends" in Facebook. It may help advertise your business (if that is your main motive) or it may show how popular you are but isn't that a bit shallow? So what if you have 1 million followers, or if you follow 1 million people? (unless you are a famous celebrity like Bill Clinton). Do you have time to read every single spam tweet? Do you intend to get to know each and every one of the 1 million followers? To me personally, I would only want people to "follow" me in Twitter, only if they already know me personally or from my blog, or if they genuinely want to know me through my tweets, what I do etc.... otherwise, I am fine if they do not "follow" me. I do not just "follow" anyone in Twitter (unless I know them) just because they are "following" me. It appears a little rude if you "unfollow" someone and that someone knows about it later.
- I have some friends and loved ones who are still adverse to using the tools of internet; Facebook, Twitter, Friendster, MSN etc... or just plainly prefer not to be online. One main gripe - loss of privacy. This issue was brought up on Sunday Times. I am not going to discuss the pros and cons of online privacy. I am just saying the pros are many if we can manage the cons properly and provided we are not abused by over-enthusiastic people who wants to "network". And anyway, to "victims" who do not wish to have their privacy invaded, they can always not add/accept someone in Facebook, or they can always "delete" someone or they can always set the privacy settings to their online information and photos. I know of parents telling their children they do not allow them to use Facebook, or Friendster or whatever... First, not being able to always pique these kids' curiosity even more that they will sooner or later "try it in the dark". Second, you can only assess how good or how bad online tools are unless you have used/explored it personally (and not just from hearsay or reading about the disadvantages of it). We have to be aware if we are not following technology, we are behind it. It is fine if we prefer not to be caught up with all these technology stuff, but do you know you are also preventing yourself from loads of useful information like first-hand important news, just as in the same way you are preventing your kids the chance to explore, the chance to decide themselves what is good or bad for them. You can always read news from newspapers yes, but it is always one day late compared to online which is instantaneously.
- I am scared of people who put on a superficial persona. On the public front, they seem nice, gracious and generous, that they attract many people to them. But when you get to know them better on a personal level, they can turn out to be petty, temperamental, edgy and easily angered and everything contradictory to what they portray on the outside. When I do meet such people, I will run away (very far) just to avoid them. I do not like any interaction with such people, much lest get scolding for nothing, especially when I had utmost respect for them in the first place (or so I thought). It makes life complicated and tiring, if you put on a mask all the time. You end up being the lonely and sad one because no one really knows you or understands you at all. Be genuine, because people can tell sooner or later if you are not.
- Self praise is the most destructive to the soul. Some people do have the habit of blowing their own trumpet all the time. Every little thing they do is glorified in unprofound ways. Self praise doesn't count. A word from someone in favour of you is worth more than 1000 glorified words you heap upon yourself. Sometimes thinking too highly of oneself makes one appear too condescending to the rest of us the "lowly" beings. Do you need to know that a person is a billionaire before you talk to him/her? Be humble.
- It was only recently I started to read some prominent bloggers' blogs. At first I was taken aback by the way they use language nowadays, and almost every sentence is peppered with not-so-nice expressions, like F**K, WTF, CCB, KNN, KNNCCB, FML etc..... In addition, I was a little appalled that they can be so blatant in scolding people in their blog. I was more concerned how this would have any effect on the younger set of readers. It also suddenly dawned on me.... no wonder a few of my young staff also "talk" in such similar manner. One of them, a guy, actually quoted a prominent blogger when he tried to justify his reason for his unprofessional rude behaviour. Does it make it alright for him and for the rest of us when that prominent blogger behaves the same way? And no wonder some of my staff in their early 20s tend to have childish expressions like "pui", "boo", "bleah" in sometimes formal official platform. It is all for fun, I know. But work is work, and we cannot mix our local slang into work unneccessarily, especially in writing. I am not saying some of these bloggers are wrong in writing that way. It is their style. And actually after reading more about what they wrote, you sort of gather what kind of character they are, sometimes lovable (that's why they are popular) sometimes bochap and rude (because they just want to be true to themselves), and sometimes they made you laugh. I guess maybe when the younger set of bloggers gets older (say when they are married and have kids), then perhaps they will be able to see how the by-then younger bloggers write, and maybe they would be shocked too (just as I am now). Then the "vicious" cycle continues...
Post note - With all the above phenomena, looks like we have to grapple with 2 extreme sets of people, from the aggressive blatant "networking" internet-savvy bunch to the internet-phobia bunch. In this instance, I guess it is always best to be somewhere in between.
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