In another 3 more days, it will be my 100 days of being a vegetarian. Surprisingly, I do not have that kind of open-champagne-excitement about reaching this milestone. Maybe because it is ... erm... wrong to want to celebrate being "normal" and to be back to being a meat eater again? I am just glad I have "survived" so long being a vegetarian (my longest veg diet ever). But seriously, I do not feel any sense of jubilation of going back to norm. In fact, I am thinking of extending the veg diet longer (in order to compensate for any "accidental food mishaps" or any wrong-doings during the past 100 days). This time, the only thing about being in a veg diet, is actually not being unable to eat meat (I did not have any mad meat cravings). Rather, it is just the little inconvenience of searching for veg food when eating out. Well, they never did say it is easy to practise compassion either.
I find it amusing and cute that my niece and nephew keep asking me every time, "can you eat (meat) already?". Some people have commented that I look refreshed and calmer than before. And physically, I have lost teeny weeny bit of weight although not that obvious. However, I know that (whether being a vegetarian or not), I am still prone to spurts of anger. I have had my angry moments but I managed to stop myself from dwelling in it for too long (I always find stuff to distract myself).
During this period, I am ultra sensitive to people around me and I kept a low profile. I do not know how to describe this, but I can feel the energy from others. Just yesterday, someone gave me the bad vibes, just from the look of her eyes. I know she was angry about something, and I may even be the target, but I do not know what she was angry about. I felt immediately hit by the intense bad energy emitting from her on the spot. At first I wanted to confront the person, but I kept quiet and turned away. For the next few hours, I felt very affected by the bad vibes that my back was hot and I had sudden diarrhoea. Had to take a cup of hot tea to calm myself down. So you see, without me doing anything, sometimes the energy from others hit me and I get sapped of mine. Besides angry people, I also try to avoid grouchy naggy people and people who have a serious expression. It is funny but I even tried to avoid some quiet people. Don't get me wrong, nothing wrong with being quiet. However, some people, I felt, while being quiet, they have an agenda towards me. I can sort of feel what they are thinking about me, and I do not like that kind of feeling (whether they love me or they are gossiping about me).
On the other hand, I prefer to stay in the company of happy people, especially kids. That is why I like to hang around with my niece and nephew, because they are full of vibrant energy, sunshine smiles and innocence. Also, simple moments between good friends can be healing too. A friend and I have been "poking" each other a few times a day, whenever we login to FB or whenever we get the email "poke" alerts (and these are pretty frequent because I have FB, emails, Twitter, msn and everything on my mobile phone!). It is like an reassuring reminder from a friend to say "hey I am here if you need me". It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. Even little things like when my cousin in Thailand msn me to say he is flying to Russia and asked if I wanted anything there, his kind thought made me happy (although I told him to fly me there as well to look for a handsome hairy man!). This is what I meant by being sensitive to the energy around me, and I heart happy energy.